My Version of the “Breast Cancer Awareness Game”

I have heard that this year’s “Breast Cancer Awareness” game is already rearing its head, and I have a couple initial thoughts.

First one being, come the fuck on. It’s not even October. It’s not even SEPTEMBER. Why why why?

My second thought is this, and will always be this, WHO IS NOT AWARE OF BREAST CANCER? Seriously, find me that person who isn’t aware of breast cancer because they need to have a talk with me. I want to know where they have been hiding for the previous 20 years and see if they need joining the 21st century.

Here’s the game: you receive this message.

“Hi beautiful ladies so here it is the time of year again when we try to raise awareness of breast cancer through a game. Its very easy and i would like all of you to participate. Last year we had to write the colour of our bra’s on our status. Men wondered for days what was going on with random colors on status’s. This year we make reference to our love life status as a flavor. Do not answer to this message just post corresponding word on your status and send this message privately to all the girls on your friends list. Blueberry is single, pineapple is its complicated, raspberry is I dont want to commit, apple is engaged, cherry is in a relationship, banana is married, avacado is I’m the better half, strawberry is can’t find mr right, lemon is I want to be single and raisin is I want to get married to my partner. Last time the bra game was mentioned on t.v let’s see if we can get there with this one. Please resend this to all your girly friends then update your status with your answer ONLY! DONT TELL ANY GUYS!
I hope to see lots of fruit 💝

 

FRUIT, BECAUSE WE’RE TALKING ABOUT OUR MELONS, LADEEZ! AMIRITE OR AMIRITE.

Okay, here is what I want you to do if you find this word excrement salad dressed up as awareness in your message box, hit a reply all and send them this:

Hi beautiful ladies!  It is the time of year again when we try to raise awareness of breast cancer , but not through a game. Games are so 2016. Let’s raise awareness by education and outreach – what do you say, gals? This year, how about we make reference to the reality of breast cancer, and send this message privately to all the girls on your friends list. Post the following: 113 for the amount of women and men who died of metastatic breast cancer in the U.S. every day;  33 months for the average lifespan following a metastatic breast cancer diagnosis; men for the fact that MEN actually get breast cancer too; Metavivor for the name of a non-profit organization dedicated SOLELY to researching metastatic breast cancer; October 13 for the one day out of the month of October dedicated to metastatic breast cancer, the only breast cancer that kills; 6% for the percentage of women and men diagnosed with stage 4 initially; and 20 to 30% which is the estimated amount of those with early stage breast cancer who become metastatic later on. Let’s see if we can get real breast cancer awareness out there! Please resend this to all your friends and then update YOUR status with your answer only! Okay, if you want to add more, by all means. This is serious business, and it’s not a fucking game. 

I hope to finally see this being taken seriously! 

What do you think, friends? Are you in? Let’s drown out the pink noise with real action.